,
Labels: Blog Update
Labels: Interactive, Music
These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.
Q: Are you sexually active?
A: No, I just lie there.
________________________________
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July 15th.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.
__________________________________
Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
_________________________________
Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget? Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?
_____________________________________
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.
____________________________________
A: He said, "Where am I. Doris?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.
_____________________________________
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.
______________________________________
A: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
___________________________________
A: He's twenty
_____________________________________
_____________________________________
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?
______________________________________
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?
______________________________________
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
______________________________________
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male or a female?
_____________________________________
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________________________________
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
______________________________________
A: Oral.
______________________________________
A: The autopsy started around
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
______________________________________
______________________________________
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere
Labels: Comedy
Labels: Glitzy: Francophile, Vacation
49 tracks in playlist, average track length: 4:04 Playlist length: 3 hours 19 minutes 52 seconds |
Playlist files:
1. The Pogues - Fairy Tale of New York (4:30)
2. Pogues, The - 03 - I Fought The Law (live feat. Joe Strummer) (3:22)
3. Pogues - London Calling (Live) (3:36)
4. The Posies - Golden Blunders (4:28)
5. Love and Rockets - So Alive (4:17)
6. 10000 Maniacs - Blind Man's Zoo - Eat for two 01 (3:31)
7. Adrian Belew - Daddy (3:07)
8. Book Of Love - Alice Everyday (3:42)
9. Damned - Plan 9 Channel 7 (5:18)
10. DANCE MUSIC - Revenge - Pineapple Face (5:32)
11. Dead or Alive - You Spin Me Round Round (techno mix) (7:59)
12. Dead Or Alive - You Spin Me Round (4:27)
13. Echo & the bunnymen - Lips like sugar (4:49)
14. edie brickell - big day little boat (3:34)
15. Eleventh Dream Day - Rose of Jericho (3:43)
16. Ferry, Bryan - Kiss And Tell (3:57)
17. Indigo Girls - Hammer And A Nail (3:51)
18. Jellyfish - Baby's Coming Back (2:57)
19. Jellyfish -King Undressed (3:58)
20. Jesus Jones - International Bright (3:12)
21. Lightning Seeds - Pure (3:47)
22. love and rockets - All in my mind (4:44)
23. Love & Rockets - No New Tell To Tale (3:27)
24. Material Issue - Li'l Christine (3:21)
25. Material Issue - Valerie Lo (3:06)
26. Rock. Nine Inch Nails - Head Like Hole (5:00)
27. REM - Orange Crush (3:51)
28. Pet Shop Boys - How can ...taken seriously (7 inch Perfect Attitude Mix) (4:10)
29. Pet Shop Boys - Opportuinites (Lets Make Lots of Money) (3:40)
30. Concrete Blonde - Everybody Knows (4:40)
31. REM - Losing My Religion (4:29)
32. REM-Eponymous-01-RadioFree (3:48)
33. Saigon Kick - My Life (4:45)
34. Simple Minds - See The Light (4:22)
35. Smithereens - A Girl Like You (4:42)
36. Social Distortion - Ball and Chain (5:44)
37. Sonic Youth - Dirty Boots (8 Track Demo- Long Version) (5:50)
38. Soup Dragons - Divine Thing (3:48)
39. Soup Dragons - I'm Free (2:44)
40. Split Enz - Split Enz - I get frightened (3:29)
41. Sting - Love Is The Seventh Wave (3:30)
42. Boom Crash Opera - Talk About It (4:39)
43. The Creatures - Boomerang - 01 - Standing There (3:04)
44. The Pixes - Here Comes Your Man (3:20)
45. The Smithereens feat. Belinda Carlisle - Blue period (2:55)
46. They Eat Their Own - Need You Like a Drug (4:09)
47. Throwing Muses - Counting Backwards (3:15)
48. Wire - Eardrum Buzz (4:14)
49. Pogues - Turkish Song Of The Damned (3:29)
Labels: Music
Labels: InternetLand WTF
Labels: Blog Spotlight, Marriage-Free, Unfriendly
Labels: Blog Update




Labels: Nerdy, Unfriendly, Video Games, WoW




I Live for tiramisu!
I Work doing something I really enjoy (programming)
I Talk less than others, I guess
I Wish is a statement you shouldn’t say to strange women lest they be vengeance demons
I Enjoy life.
I Look for lost things quite often
I Must try sleeping for more than four hours during the work week
I Forget people’s names more often now. Irritating.
I Find the lost things eventually
I Smell peanut butter. I just made a sammich.
I Listen to lots of different music.
I Hide my feelings sometimes but I’m not very good at it
I Pray? Not at all
I Walk less now because it’s winter
I Write less proficiently than I used to
I See Druid People!
I Sing in the car
I Left my Dee-Lite cd at work
I Won a gift certificate to Applebees once.
I Can do whatever I put my mind to
I Own vinyl records
I Watch ‘The Dog Whisperer’
I Yearn to travel to France
I Daydream often
I Fall usually when stairs or ice are involved
I Want winning lottery tickets
I Cry easily
I Burn incense
I Read less than I used to
I Rode a pony when I was 5.
I Sometimes sleep in past
I Hurt when I’m betrayed
I Fear stairs
I Hope someone has made it this far down the list
I Use Burt’s Bees products
I Still count on my fingers
I Drink Diet 7-Up, 64 ounces of water and coffee every day
I Stop cat fights daily
I Save things I probably shouldn’t (read that as PACKRAT)
I Lost my patience for stupidity
I Take Splenda and a little orange juice in my coffee…no creamer or milk
I Trip-Out after about 3 good strong Belgian Ales
I Hug Unfriendly
I Play with my kitties
I Miss my girlfriends who are scattered around the world
I Drive kinda aggressive-like
I Learn whenever I can
I Dream of gloves. I don’t know what that means.
I Forgive because I can
I Feel sleepy
I Can't use the phrase ‘I Can’t’
I Applaud before the rest of the crowd does
Labels: About Glitzy, Memes
Labels: Blog Spotlight, Other Kitties
Labels: InternetLand WTF